The deepest dark is something devastating. The worst part is not the dark itself, but the light around it. Think of those caves, I once visited one in Liguria, where you walk in and experience absolute darkness. There, you know you are in total darkness, but you also know the exit is near, the light within reach.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So why do I call it devastating? Because when we are in a darkness where we see no light at all, we are in that place where we must sit, breathe, and find the light inside ourselves. A solution exists, and it is within us. I know an alternative exists too, but in my philosophy of life it is not on the table. It does not exist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When instead we are in the deepest dark but aware that light exists out there, a case emerges that looks similar on the surface but is profoundly different. That light was not created by us, it has always existed. Because it has always existed, we have no control over it, and above all it is not the direct product of our own work. It is a goal to reach, a finish line to earn, through a path and a strength that, precisely in the deepest dark, often goes missing or struggles to show up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In dark moments, thoughts of various kinds pass through our minds. I am not talking about the most obvious one, and I deliberately will not name it. I am talking about work instead. If your mind thinks, reasons, creates, expands in a reticular way, it holds power that should not be underestimated. Because that same capacity that builds valid products can also construct valid solutions in territory that is not grey, but black. Here the greatest risk is the parallel with Walter White.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Think of something simple. You manage to create a digital version of a magazine. You put it online and resell it, a bit like those who use pirated streaming services. You might think exactly like Walter White: “I am doing this because I need to recover liquidity, and once I have recovered it, I will shut it down.” But be careful. How did Breaking Bad end? We all know that by now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Another example, if it helps: Doctor Strange and the Darkhold, in the MCU version. He uses the forbidden book for a good reason, but it corrupts him anyway. He saves himself, no doubt, but the third eye remains, proof of the corruption he still went through.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
By contrast, think of Churchill and the film about unconventional operations during the Second World War. Winston operated in grey territory, so-called ethical pragmatism. His actions were unconventional, at times dirty, but with a legitimate goal: defeating the Nazis. What was the difference from Walter White and from Strange? The method. Churchill acted from a validated position, he was Prime Minister, and he still answered to certain institutional bodies. His actions, even the most ambiguous ones, passed through people who approved or rejected the choice. It was not an unchecked escalation leading straight into total darkness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Here is the thing: when we are in that deepest dark, the one where the light has always existed but has not yet been reached, our ethical filter wavers. This filter is associated with a part of the brain called the ventromedial prefrontal cortex, which, simplifying, we can describe as the centre that integrates emotions and moral values into our decisions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When that filter weakens, the brain network that handles deliberate cognitive control, clear and strategic thinking, risks letting go. And the mind, when it wanders freely without oversight, can slip quickly toward automatic thoughts like “well, what could happen.” This is more of an image than a precise laboratory finding, but it captures well how quickly the mind can build itself a justification.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In that moment we have to be strong. We must not let go of that ethical filter, we must not forget the positive automatisms we built with effort over time. If we do not forget them, we get through that moment. And if we get through it, our mind starts asking: “What if there were another way?” Because in that moment it sees resilience, and it generates antifragility, capable of giving us the steps needed to reach the light.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Difficult, tremendously difficult, but not impossible. Right now I am in it, inside this process. I am fighting. The pull to give in, like Walter White, I have been close to it, and maybe I still am, but my filter does not let go. In fact, it shows up with the right imagery even in my sleep, and Jung would have something to say about that, and it keeps me alert. I feel the cognitive control and the new positive automatisms I have built starting to switch on. I am working on it. I am not letting go. Something is showing, and what is showing is not bad.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The deepest dark is not the absence of light, it is knowing the light exists but is not yet within reach. In those moments the ethical filter wavers, and the mind risks building dangerous justifications, like Walter White in Breaking Bad. <\/p>\n
The difference between slipping into black and staying in legitimate grey, like Churchill during the war, lies entirely in the method and the oversight. Staying steady is difficult. Not impossible.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[118,1],"tags":[1579,2140,2086,368,1552,323,1789,2142],"class_list":["post-522","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-complexity","category-free-thoughts","tag-control","tag-ethicsunderpressure","tag-liquidity","tag-metacognition","tag-personalgrowth","tag-philosophy","tag-resilience","tag-strength"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/522","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=522"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/522\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":523,"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/522\/revisions\/523"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=522"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=522"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lucainfante.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=522"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}