Internalisation works step by step, and the results show when metacognition and awareness pause for a moment to analyse how we are thinking and acting. Absurdly, precisely in the most intense moments.
In this period I have accumulated significant tiredness, and I am not doing enough to relax. A series of events is making that difficult. This is not an excuse, it is an element of analysis. One of the things I am working on is precisely avoiding this happening again. But let us analyse together what happens when tiredness meets work, personal, and family situations.
Work: when internalisation saves you without looking like a miracle
Having internalised, in the past, certain techniques drawn from philosophy, from Sun Tzu, from Go, and implicitly from rhetoric too, helped me a great deal in two recent situations with clients. Renewal negotiations, and the conclusion of a project where significant issues had emerged.
I noticed that my awareness perceived the tiredness, and also perceived my tendency to act compulsively in order to close things quickly. Metacognition blocked that tendency, giving me the space to do targeted exercises, have a good coffee, and rethink the situation more calmly. Had I not internalised all of this beforehand, I would have made mistakes anyway, and the tiredness would probably have won out even with the exercises.
When we try something, integrate it, work on it, over time it becomes ours. It reaches the level of automatism. And precisely when we are tired, it almost saves us. It is not a miracle. It is deep work that pays off in the medium and long term. We can work on internalisation at any time, though it obviously works better in calm moments. In full, demanding moments it does not mean stopping, but proceeding with caution.
Even during these tired days I avoided adding weight, except for one day when an idea spontaneously came to me to apply. It gave me a small gratification, and I began making it mine. Even when we are tired, something can still grow.
Family: talking as the first tool
The same logic allows us, within the family, to help and, when needed, resolve, without forgetting the most important part: talking. Starting a conversation, saying we are tired, showing our vulnerability, trying to respond the way we always would but without the fear that if we get the tone or the gesture wrong, the other person ends up hurt.
It sounds absurd, but a simple measure like this helps everyone. And it does not come on its own. It requires awareness, metacognition, and therefore internalisation. With different degrees and intensities, of course, but the mechanism is the same.
Ourselves: the line between growth and dangerous narrative
We come to the third point: ourselves. On a personal level, being aware shows us how tired we are. It stops us from repeating past mistakes. It leads us to say “I need to switch off” and, when that is not immediately possible, it still pushes us to find a remedy. It helps in the process of improvement.
And here is the most important part: being careful not to rigidify into extreme positions, or worse, using our own abilities, reticular thinking, a passion for philosophy, to build convincing but dangerous narratives. Heidegger is the most cited historical example, one of the most profound thinkers of the twentieth century, whose adherence to Nazism remains one of the most discussed paradoxes in contemporary philosophy. But we do not need to go that far back in time. Even today, in fields like technology and entrepreneurship, there is no shortage of intellectually formidable figures who build, with the same rigour used elsewhere for good, justifications for far less noble positions. Those with a critical eye recognise them.
The lesson is that depth of thought does not guarantee the goodness of the conclusions it leads to. It must always be accompanied by ethical scrutiny, otherwise it becomes a tool as dangerous as it is powerful.
The point of all this
On this blog I have talked and keep talking about my journey, my difficulties, what I discover and what I enjoy. Internalisation can reach anyone, and the other words I have used over the months, metacognition, awareness, agency, arrive the same way, with different degrees.
All of this, over time, improves us. And with the right use, it helps us integrate better and work on the society around us. With due care, with ethical pragmatism where needed, but always doubting in the purest sense of the scientific method. Because absolute certainty, even when it comes from a good inner journey, is the first sign that something is beginning to rigidify.