A boulder in a river doesn’t stop it, it changes it. Over time the river wears it down and makes it part of itself. That’s exactly what I’m learning to do with my habits, not just on easy days but especially on hard ones.
What happens when you stop waiting for the ideal moment and start working on it on the worst days instead?
The boulder in the river: building a habit that holds up on hard days Read Post »
On vacation, maybe for the first time, my mind actually stopped. And in that stillness, the ghosts I’ve been working through showed up. Facing them hurts more than ignoring them ever did, but that’s where the real work starts. Coming home hit harder than I expected.
What happens when your brain stops running and starts remapping the connections that used to hurt you?
When You Come Face to Face With Yourself Read Post »
The deepest dark is not the absence of light, it is knowing the light exists but is not yet within reach. In those moments the ethical filter wavers, and the mind risks building dangerous justifications, like Walter White in Breaking Bad.
The difference between slipping into black and staying in legitimate grey, like Churchill during the war, lies entirely in the method and the oversight. Staying steady is difficult. Not impossible.
The deepest dark: when the light already exists but we must still reach it Read Post »
A few days ago, a child angry over an unfair situation had a moment that society would have condemned without appeal. And yet that same society always finds a way to justify violence when it comes from an adult convinced they are right.
Behind that childish anger there was only intelligence with no one listening, in a society that invests far too little in mental health care and far too much in rhetorical calls to old values. What is truly missing is community.
When a child’s anger tells us more than politics does Read Post »
A weekend that mixed everything together: personal news I chose to face instead of endure, liquidity weighing again, and friends opening up about their own struggles. In the middle of it, the discovery that the Go stones are truly working, that the mind is shifting from rumination to agency.
And confirmation that community, real support around mental health, is still deeply lacking in this society. But something, slowly, is moving.
Marcus Aurelius wrote for himself, with no thought of publication, and that journaling helped him govern an empire under enormous pressure. In this period of liquidity stress I understand why: Epictetus gave me the theoretical foundations, but it is Marcus Aurelius who becomes essential now, when theory must turn into concrete action.
You do not give up the planting. You face it, one number at a time.
Marcus Aurelius and Epictetus: two faces of stoicism when the pressure shifts Read Post »
Accepting a trigger from the past does not automatically mean feeling fine. The real challenge comes after: not succumbing when that trigger resurfaces. In moments of tiredness, when even metacognition risks becoming a spectator instead of a guide, it is the Go stones placed in calm moments that make the difference.
As Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius taught, each in his own way: do not deny the emotion, do not let it take control.
Accepting is not enough: why not succumbing is the real challenge Read Post »
Yesterday something unpleasant happened that showed me three things at once. How the mind can know a fear is irrational without being able to act on that knowledge. How “call me if you feel bad” is not enough, and real presence is needed instead. And how you can grieve someone who is still alive, when the person you knew stops existing while still being in the world.
Today, the day after, I am well. Not perfectly, but well.
When the mind knows but the body will not obey: grief, friendship and fear Read Post »
Internalisation truly shows itself when it arrives precisely in the tired moments, almost saving you without looking like a miracle.
During this period of accumulated tiredness I saw metacognition block compulsive tendencies at work, I saw how talking openly helps in the family more than any technique, and I understood the thin line between personal growth and dangerous narratives built with the very same tools we use to improve ourselves.
Internalisation, part two: when it arrives to save you precisely in the tired moments Read Post »
Internalising does not mean repeating until you memorise. It means bringing a concept so deeply inside that it becomes an automatism, something you no longer have to reach for when you need it. Over the past year philosophy moved from work into personal life as a genuine escalation.
Two recent episodes, a complex negotiation and a volunteering situation with an aggressive interlocutor, showed me what it means when Socrates, Dewey and Gadamer stop being tools and become part of you.
Internalising: when a concept stops being a tool and becomes part of you Read Post »
